Child Psychology

Rooohhh, herro there...

So, yesterday, I left work early enough so as to maximize on the time spent with Dan in revising for his second day of exams. Bam numero uno! Traffic heading to town - isn't that weird? I dunno what caused it, but there was as much traffic going to town as there was from town (that latter being expected daily). Despite this, I arrived to pick Dan up from at my Mom's early-ish. Bam numero dos!! There he is - among all nephews/baby-bro - watching a movie that they all wanted to see for so long... and it had just started! How dare I strip him away from that, right? I was also feeling a bit under the weather (please PLEEEEEEEZE be chickenpox!!), so there I was trying to nod off in the noise while sitting in a not-too-comfy chair. Eventually - when it finishes - we head to his mother's place to start the ball a-rolling. After a shower, we only had about 2 hours before his dad picks him back up! Darnnnn. In any event, we began...

... very smoothly too. We started with his favourite subject (and mine! Math!), so we were both in jovial moods. Yey. Then we got to something he didn't understand... I tried to explain it to him, but he was just not concentrating. Then I realised - duuuuuuuuuude - I didn't feed the child! Fadda Lawd. So, I got right on to my gourmet chefrus maximus role and prepared - ahem ahem - macaroni and cheese (from the box) with stewed chicken (from my mom) - *teehee*. He gobbled it up (little dude likes to eat - and any other thing that would assist in his beloved procrastination *sounds familiar?!*) - however, I still used this time to go over some concepts *what's wrong with me? Don't I get it?! The little dude's concentration lies in his stomach at the mo! Geez...* - this did NOT go down as well as the stew did. He just couldn't get anything that was coming out of my mouth... no matter how I broke it down. Know what happened? He just wasn't interested anymore - and we all know how difficult a barrier that is to cross! I got so irritated that I raised my voice just a bit - as if his not understanding had to do with some sort of hearing problem - whew. This just made things worse - perhaps by intimidating him and giving blows to his already shattered self-esteem. Holy Camoly... I was on a roll, wasn't I? After I went back into "nice" mode, he still refused to even look at me while I asked questions, gave examples of the answers, gave hints ... nada. He had... dum dum dummmm .... COMPLETELY locked me off!

All in all, this is basically how it went from there - yeah - though we had just under an hour left, we got NADA done... NADA. He cried, stared blankly into space and pouted... yet never said a word. No matter which approach I used - the ever so nice, the stern - heck, I even pulled the "Jesus is looking down on this" card. Nada still.

Know what I did here? I just sat him down, and - in a normal voice - went over ALL his work; basically, I preached to the little dude... "drop the 'e' before adding the suffix... double the last letter if the vowel sound is short then add '-ing'... 'i' before 'e' except after 'c' when the sound of the 'e' is long..." alles.... alles alles ALICE!

I just never gave in... no matter how much I wanted to. I let him know - hey, I ain't giving up, in, sideways, noways ... I'm sticking with you - even though both you and I want to.

That was one of the hardest things to do... but I did it.

We ended, he went to lay down before his daddy called to say he's on his way... he 'fell asleep' (or, rather, pretended to so as to avoid the tension... heck, I OWN that trick)... I woke him "Dan, daddy's here - *kiss* see you tomorrow". So he knows - yes, we are still on, and no, you didn't bother me (though it did, I couldn't let him know he has that power over moi).

Later, feeling the stress of it all come down on me, I went to my (other) sister's - she was just going through work with her son, Dav (same age, same school, same exam as his cousin - little dude, Dan), and there were so many similarities - however, their personalities still came through - Dav would kick and scream and cry and fuss... Dan would lock off and stare; Dav is certainly an extrovert while Dan is the opposite, dealing with things internally. They both had walls up to this horrid thing called schoolwork. Truth be told - I believe getting through to Dan, due to his personality, was 100 times more difficult than getting through to Dav; Dav wasn't shy about saying "I don't know! I don't understand this! I rather lie down - my head aches! *growl cry and grumble*". With Dav, we could talk things through.... with Dan... good luck getting over than high barrier he creates.

Child Psychologist - I give thee praise *and a couple Kalms for the nerves*.

You learn something from everything, right? What did I learn from all that? Lots of things... firstly, that to be regarded as more flexible and to keep myself open to really work things through, I should be more open and verbal and truthful about my current status on the given matter. I think it's win-win - benefits those who would have to work with you and also is self beneficial. People would also be less prone to give up on me...

...or is that so? Knowing Dan's potential also added to my continuous trying to get through - because when he does, he shines. It's as if through his introvert manner he meticulously processes stuff - just on his own time, and in his own way. Dav... he lays everything out there for you... and is heavily influenced by the external. You not only guide his thoughts, you also sometimes create it for him... he goes on what he hears/is taught. So, what you give in, you should expect to come right back out - that's "getting it" for him.

I dunno... I going on what I get from 2 9/10 year-old dudes here! Cut me some slack :P

Ok.... woof, I blabbed. *whosablabba? zusablabba!*




*Yes... stay tuned for another episode of The Adventures of ZuperZue - Teacher Edition*